There. That three letter word up there captures 2010 for me. During debriefing in November, God showed me this was the word.  Weeks ago, I added a little button on the side of my blog that says: Choose Joy.  I love words.  I love capturing them in my heart and letting them resonate there until they reverberate in my words and actions.

The beginning of 2010 started in another state without much internet time and much time soaking up Him.  So, when the buzz filled the blog world about everyone’s “word” for the year, I downloaded and read. Then I hesitated, I held back, I debated in my head about my word.  Why? I wanted something with more movement, more boldness, more strength, more uniqueness, more oomph, more drive, more goal orientated, more specific.  I wanted a rare, special word only for me. I didn’t want my word used!

But in the running around, I’ve found joy being talked all over in new, fresh, unique ways that spoke to my heart.  I saw it everywhere. God kept pricking my heart and reminding me that He didn’t just pick any word. Oh no. He choose a word just for me. Just for this season. Because He delights in me. This is part of a bigger plan. A God-filled vision. A joyful me. He wants me to journey with joy this year. To choose joy.  To take this little three lettered word and stamp it on my heart so that everyone can see.  To let my words and actions be oozing with joy in an irresistible and contagious way that everyone can’t help but wonder and ask who is behind it all…because He is.

So, here I am…stepping out onto the water and flinging myself fully into the water so that I’m covered completely by Him.

“When my life is like a storm, rising waters all I want is the shore. You say I’ll be okay and make it through the rain. You are my shelter from the storm. And everything rides on hope now. Everything rides on faith somehow. When the world has broken me down, your love sets me free.”

“I’ve got the joy joy joy joy down in my heart.”


If you know me even a little, then you probably know that I tend to think….think a lot.  Sometimes to the point where it gets in the way and puts up walls (not a good thing) and stops things from going from my head to my heart.  The last few days I got all caught up in the thinking.  The heady, here’s what experience tells me.  I “know” the truth, but I couldn’t shake the all over the board emotions ranging from confused to frustrated to happy to disappointed to sad to lonely to okay to everything else.  I bounced around and couldn’t find my footing on the solid rock.

Until today. I sat in class and I tried to pay attention and engage in conversation, but every once in a while my thoughts would overwhelm me still.  Until I heard these words, “Follow Me.”  Funny thing is that we were talking about ministering to youth and I really don’t remember how that fit in and neither does my roomie (I asked her later).  So then, God immediately brought to mind the verse below:

“…what is that to you?  You follow Me!”

My reaction: Whoa. Lord, you are so here.  You are so getting my attention.  Because really.  What is it to me that ___ is doing this or that God is working in that way in their lives.  Even, who is that to me and what is that to you that I’m working in a way you didn’t expect.  When all I need to focus on is following Him then everything else fades away.  Africa fades away. Lindo fades away. Thrive fades away. Hope House kids fade away. Marriage fades away.

Yes, good things and yes, serving is good, but He just wants me to “be.”  He loves me when I’m just sitting on the floor with Him leaning against my bed.  He wants me to follow Him and be with Him.  He wants to step out only on His firm foundation.

“It had opened her eyes to the fact that right down in the depths of her own heart she really had but one passionate desire, not for the things which the Shepherd had promised but for himself.  All she wanted was to be allowed to follow him forever. “Nothing else really matters only to love him and to do what he tells me.” -Hinds Feet in High Places

Still Here Waiting

Funny story.  When the hunters finally left on Sunday, I went for a little run.  Turns out, I’m the lucky intern to see all the….snakes.  Yep, the thing that I had been dreading the most finally happened.  I went for a run on this fun path that loops around and I was running along listening to a podcast on Ecclesiastes when all the sudden there it was in the middle of the path. Not going to lie, I freaked out and sprinted the other way.  Finally, I controlled my freaking out and crying enough to realize that I was okay.  I was far away from the big scary snake and that I could keep going.  I stuck to the main road for the rest of the way.  We’ll see how long it takes before I head out on that path again 🙂

Sphere of Influence

“it took a while, but i finally realized that it’s not a large amount of influence that matters.  it’s the right kind of influence.”

Full post here.

I’m not capable of having thousands of super deep, close relationships.  I couldn’t find the time in the day even if I wanted to.  The stats on this blog may have gone up since I started, but even so my sphere of influence is still quite small.  I’m perfectly okay with that.  I desire to positively effect, challenge, support, encourage, help and all those other verbs to those within my “small” sphere of influence well rather than focus on expansion.  Kind of goes back to the whole if you do well with a little then more will be given.  So, there you have it.  My thoughts before I FINALLY get my own, real internet connection! 🙂  Enjoy the long weekend!!