What’s Up Wednesday

hearing Boaz crunch on an apple that I deemed too old for me to eat

seeing the book of Luke and my DSM book

thinking that I’m ready for spring and to be able to go outside!

doing bible reading, breaking free, and a final exam

looking forward to seeing sigur ros, going to virginia, and planning another vacay

feeling content and happy to have Boaz home

touching the wooden chairs my grandmother made

missing africa and friends

thankful for being able to sleep in, cereal, pretty wedding pictures, marriage, friends, sunlight, mountains

excited about going to the mountains again

coming up easter, spring, and ally & levi coming home!

something old the shorts i’m wearing that i love

something new a super soft liberty sweatshirt that i got for free

something blue Boaz’s chew toy

3 months and counting

3 super happy months of being married! woot! in celebration, I went through our wedding pictures and honeymoon pictures to finally post them on facebook.  if we’re friends, you can look at them here. made me totally want to do the whole day over again and to run off to the mountains and the beach like now. but instead, i’ll make a list of all the fun things i love about life right where i’m at! in no particular order here are 12 things for the 12th.

1. being married

2. my awesome husband

3. my adorable dog Boaz who loves me

4. my church family.

5. a wonderful place to live that is warm even though it’s still cold outside

6. traveling to look forward to in the future

7. friends’ super cute babies

8. being able to e-mail and text best friends

9. being able to cook all sorts of deliciousness

10.  pinterest boards of lovely things

11. books to read and time to read them

12. mornings spent with god reading the bible and doing the breaking free bible study

What are you loving about your life right now?

home.

Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking. er…write for as long and however your heart needs =)

home

i hide from this word sometimes because oh how it haunts me in a heartbreakingly raw way.  before i know it, i’m playing around with google looking up for ways to get myself home. checking flights and seeing prices. looking at pictures and wondering if when i get there if it’ll still be home.  will she still be the home i have in my heart?  i’ve changed so much since my feet last hit her ground.  my heart has traveled all over since then. i’ve found myself at the feet of fountains in rome and on the beaches of greece. i’ve walked the streets of london and sat in her theaters.  i’ve sat in staff meetings with staff i love.  i’ve careened around the streets of sri lanka.  i’ve zip lined through mexico.  i’ve laughed and loved my way through VBS and kids camps.  i’ve held the babes in rwanda.  i’ve found a man who holds my heart and is my other kind of home…the strong, steady, safe.  god’s brought me all the places i never thought i’d go. but then again i never thought i’d find myself in south africa in the first place. and i don’t know where He’ll bring me us next. maybe germany. maybe guatemala. maybe china. maybe back home to south africa (pretty please?).  maybe some country i’ve never even thought about.

Marathon + Africa Love + Home

I love how God works things out. I do.  I sat here thinking how am I going to write a post that shows my heart and offers an opportunity and in the midst of my writing I realized that it’s Friday, which means I get to link up with The Gypsy Mama. Love that…and then I found out what the prompt was and how perfect it fit in with everything.  I was going to do two posts, but they connect together so…here goes… Five minutes on….

HOME

There’s a place I call home. There’s a place I find my heart and mind wandering to all the time. I can’t seem to get her out of my heart. I thought once some things settled the ache would go away, but it intensified. I thought I could go and then continue on my life as before.

My life got interrupted.

My heart changed.

My eyes opened.

I still see her sunrises and sunsets. The stripes of the zebras and the elegance of the giraffe.  The power of the lion and the ugly baby wildebeasts.  The dirt paths that took my feet running up and down hills at the foot of mountains that caught my breath.

The people who stole my heart. The babies that fought for their lives. The little ones who lost parents.  The park filled with children. The place where I put a name and a face to the statistics about AIDs, rape, and poverty. The joy unspeakable mixed with a hope for a different future.

You can take the girl out of Africa, but you can’t take Africa out of the girl’s heart.

She’s still home.

Tomorrow I run. I run for God. I run for Africa.

26.2 miles.

STOP

 

Now here’s the fun part.

You can catch the vision too.

Not only will I have Africa on my shirt, Sesotho on my wrist, stories in my heart, and prayers on my lips for Africa for 26.2 miles, but I also am going to be intentional and strategic about giving.

I’m still being the persistent widow who keeps asking God for a chance to put my feet back on African ground, but until then I’ll be like the other widow in the bible who gave abundantly and cheerfully.

I’d love for you to partner with me and send a little love and encouragement both my way and Africa’s way…maybe you can give $2.62 or $26.20 or $262.0 or $2,620 or maybe you can commit to pray for a 2.62 minutes or 26.2 minutes or 2 days or really however long or much God puts on your heart.  He knows, you know.

If you’d like to join me in blessing and giving to Ignite South Africa as they tangibly pour out love into the communities where I found home then follow this link and you can give online.

 

home

my heart finds joy in its many homes

often they come and they go

but no matter how far away they are

my heart carries them

and while they are here

my cup tries to soak up every moment

to tide the ache until they come again.

home:

the lovely overwhelming weight that feels like nothing at all.

walking into a place with complete comfort and god-confidence

feeling safe

what love looks like

my people

being known

in to me you see

belonging, love, acceptance, no pretenses, no expectations, eager for growth

the heart beat that connects us together

being lifted up and lifting up

standing in the gap by talking to god about them

iron sharpening iron

god.

what does home look like to you? where do you feel most at home?

*homes i’ve soaked up this weekend: tara, carrie, amy, liz, june (from skype at least!), africa (from memories and talking), antioch, god…my heart is very full…

right here, right now…joy.

hello week. good-bye weekend. i feel like i need another weekend. seriously i’m finding that the days and weeks keep going faster and faster. before long…i’ll be old 😉 i feel like a happy broken record coming here each week and saying that joy is everywhere and that i feel so….loved. joyful. at peace. excited. at home. seriously, y’all (i’m not southern but i just felt like saying that), God is so very faithful. months ago, one of my intern people told me about how when he was praying for me that he saw a book where i needed to focus on the page at hand rather than look ahead to the end. i think i’m finally starting to live like that and trust God like that. saying hello to the new adventure right here, right now and not trying to make another adventure happen on my own.  so, without further ado, here are some snapshots of joy…

816. knowing that people have my back

830. more swings, more swings (cute little kiddos on the playground)

871. eating brownies with a spoon from the pan with my people

876. melting into peace

879. moments where my heart stops in a good way

880. memories i want to hold onto

888. closing my eyes to soak up the moment

908. bananagrams and cribbage and laughing and fabulous people

938. watching life!

and before you run off…don’t forget to comment because it makes my heart happy to hear from you all! did you watch life? what was the highlight of your week? anything I can be praying for you about?

p.s. i’m SO close to 1000 gifts. 🙂

 

We Are Full of Beauty

that moment.

when the clock slows to fast forward.

to wrap us up in a memory that holds the sunrise of hope.

love.peace.comfort.overflowing.

into home.

being.simply being.

you.me.

being able to let all the masks fall off.

to fall asleep.

fully present. in beauty.

full of beauty.

*This is my response to the challenge presented by Sarah: “Write a blog post about beauty. Your thoughts, your pain, your triumphs. It can be outer beauty, inner beauty, what you hate, what you love. Anything. Be creative. It can even be a single photo.”

**That right there. written above. that’s when I feel beautiful and fully me. nothing held back.and even though it’s few and far between my heart so wants to feel and find that “fall asleep home” that fully comes from God more often. because in Him is where I am full of beauty.

***So, what about you? What are your thoughts about beauty?

9000 miles

I’ve read before that home will always be the place for which you feel the deepest affection for, no matter where you are.  I’m feeling this so much right now.  I may be in the town I grew up and the place that much of my family lives.  But, home seems so far away.  9000 miles feels so far, but hearing Lindo’s voice this morning makes everything seem a little closer.  I never knew I could love/hurt so much by being away from ‘home.’  When I look at the picture of Lindo and I above, I see home.  I love what it portrays: love, happiness, joy, fullness, fun, patience, gentleness, and most of all feeling at home.  I say it over and over, but here I’ll say it again and again: God is BIG.  He answers my prayers. He listens to me. He holds my heart when it’s breaking. He wipes my tears for the millionth time.  He gives me passion. He fills me up with His love.  He gives me perfect gifts.  He gives me more than I could ever ask for or imagine. Above all, He loves me.

I will rejoice in the day that the Lord has made.  I rejoice that even when I’m feeling far away from home, He gave me a piece of home by letting me hear the voice a little boy who is 9000 miles away.

my heart is breaking

Friday at Hope House resulted in teary eyes and good-byes.  The caretaker let me know that Lindo’s uncle was coming that day to take him home and that he wouldn’t be coming back. I already miss him.  my heart is breaking. At least I can pray for him.

Philippians 1:7 I hold you in my heart

Top 25*

Turn it Up by Aaron Lines (258): Happy summer music and a happy someday.

Everclose by Matt Wertz (247): I fall asleep to music on repeat.

Good-bye My Lover by James Blunt (229): I know hurt.

Ever the Same by Rob Thomas (173): Chill happy

Girl Next Door by Saving Jane (164): Sometimes I feel like this.

Home by Michael Buble (162): I love home and the feeling of being home even when it’s not a place.

When You Say Nothing at All by Ronan Keating (160): Songs from movies make me happy.

I Always Liked that Best by Cyndi Thompson (153): I like that feeling…

For All Time by Soluna (146): So…what? I like love songs 🙂

Crush by Mandy Moore (145): I love being sparkled

Kiss the Rain by Billie Myers (141): I know what it’s like being far away

That’s Where it is by Carrie Underwood (141): Once again…I like that feeling

You’re Like Coming Home by Emerson Drive (130): Home is where my heart is

Take You Back by Jeremy Camp (126): I love Jesus

My Jesus by Todd Agnew (123): I want real, authentic life

Have a Little Faith by Mandy Moore (112): All about faith, hope and love

You Said by Shane and Shane (112): I say a little prayer for you

The Lover after Me by Savage Garden (102): Sometimes it hurts

Misconception by Matt Woods (97): I listen to catchy songs on repeat

On a Night Like This by Dave Barnes (95): I believe in love stories

Lovin’ You Lovin’ Me by Chris Cagle (93): Real love, real life

Every Little Thing by Hawk Nelson (91): I want to be that girl

You’re Beautiful by James Blunt (90): Tragic, but powerful

Summer Girl by Jessica Andrews (87): I wear flip flops

Everything There is To Know About You by Mark Wills (84): I love asking questions

*Disclaimer: Just to clarify the playcount totals are from my computer only and not the combined totals from both my computer and iPod.  So, in all reality I’ve probably listened to Turn it Up over 500 times. hehe 🙂