Recently…

Eating…Raisin Bran Crunch

Drinking…water, but I’m excited to try some sipping chocolate from Trader Joe’s!

Listening to…NPR on my drives.  They’ve been talking about the Walker Art Center and about the Supreme Court.  Oh and Ebola of course.

Reading…A Memory of Light by Robert Jordan, True Woman 101 Divine Design, Basic Training for the Prophetic Ministry, and the Bible.

Remembering…all the little babies and all of the love that I’ve seen throughout the day as people mark and point out that today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.

Loving…Trader Joe’s oreo like cookie butter, my little man, the husband, and just God’s favor.

Missing…Boaz since he’s off pheasant hunting with my dad.

Wanting…a vacation to somewhere fun and really just to travel!

What have you been doing recently?!

Life

I was beginning to think that I should have titled this series “Life” since it seems like I mostly have time to write up a quick post about our day or share a picture or two, but then if I go all connector-like and slow down, I realize that really becoming the beloved is partly about embracing this every day, ordinary life.  There’s so much to find in the little moments of grace and the moments of struggle.  I get to be the beloved in both places.

In much of this series and in life, I’m finding the “both and” instead of “either or,” which leads me back to thinking about the prodigal son story.  The prodigal son and the older brother were both loved dearly by the Father.  The Father wanted them both to experience and enjoy in all His goodness.  He had gifts and experiences for them.  He did not live by “fair” standards nor did He buy into a scarcity concept.  No, indeed, the Father promoted abundance.  There’s more than enough to go around.  There’s more than enough for everyone to be loved fully.

When I find myself forgetting that there is enough, I find myself stepping out of that fully loved place and into one of jealousy, envy, and fear.  Mostly, I fear that by someone else being promoted or lifted up or complimented or loved that the equation then flips around to equal that I am not whatever they are.  Instead, there is room for both of us.  The older brother missed out on that.  He and his brother could be celebrated and loved.  His brother didn’t need to be a threat to his security, identity, worth, or celebration.  I’m sure there were enough calves to be eaten and hugs to go around.  The Father was willing to celebrate and enjoy this life with both of his sons.  He didn’t need to chose only one. He included them both.

I’m not there yet, but that’s where I’m headed.  I’m jumping into, “becoming” aware, and embracing just how I am the beloved and others can be too.  There’s room for us all at the table.

Lectio Divinia

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

-Philippians 4:4-7

I’ve written before about Lectio Divinia here and about how much I enjoy it.  For a quick recap, you read a section of scripture four times focusing on different parts.  Here are the four steps:

• Listen
• Word/Phrase
• Invitation
• Response

This morning as I was chatting with some ladies, we ended on the passage above and I thought it was fitting that God would tie this right into my 31 days series.  Here’s what spoke to my heart on the three active steps.

• The word/phrase that stuck out was guard.  I was reminded about how God goes before us and is behind us.  He really has us covered and I can trust in that.
• The invitation that I felt prompted by was say it again.  This kind of put me on edge because I knew that the meaning I was pulling from the phrase is a little different than the context, but it resonated with my heart.  The way I took it was that God is inviting me to say His word again.  To speak out truth over myself, my family, and others.
• My response to God was one filled with thankfulness.  I am so thankful that He doesn’t leave, that He hears all of our cares, and that He gives good gifts.  Asher was sitting on my lap smiling away during this one and I just thought it was a fitting picture to have about rejoicing and casting our cares on the Almighty.

So, that’s where I’m at today. Soaking in this word!

What sticks out to you from the passage above?

Becoming the Beloved

So.  There’s this thing that I did a few years ago and well I saw it pop up again and thought…let’s go for it again! The goal: write every day for the 31 days of October.  Plus, I recently got chosen to join in on a writing course (I am pumped!) so I thought this would be a good opportunity to add accountability and fun to writing.

I’m diving in with my expectations open and my heart willing to explore all different avenues.  I’m anticipating that you might find mini devotionals, pictures, quotes, scripture, life updates, and heart thoughts throughout the month.  I suspect that each day will bring a bit of a surprise along this journey.  I want to bring my heart deeper into an intimate knowing that I am the beloved of God.  This is something that I’m pretty good at knowing in my head, but getting it to my heart is a whole other story.  And so it begins!

p.s. Maybe you’re wondering why I picked a sprinkle doughnut for a button picture? Well, check back for a future post on that little topic later this week!

Beloved: dearly loved, a much loved person

be delicate: what I learned in march

Now, I know that in terms of days, March technically only has 3 days more than February…though, this year I’ve deemed this the longest month ever.  With lingering snow storms, I’m a little weary of March and hoping that April might hold more promise—I’m not holding my breath, though!  I keep thinking that at least by the time this little baby comes we likely will have grass.  Right?  Grass by June/July seems reasonable.  In other news, I’ve let a whole month slip by without a single blog post but hey I’m here again linking up.  April just might be a good month for all sorts of things (blogging and sunshine!).  Until then…here’s what I learned in March!

1. I may say that I am Boaz’s favorite…but here is some evidence that sometimes this crazy dog prefers the husband over me.  Either way, that dog loves to be close.

2. Trader Jo’s oreo shakes…yes please!  Apparently, I’m rather particular about the thickness of my shakes.  We followed a recipe for these and let me tell you, I was not impressed.  So, I did what only made sense and started adding more ingredients.  After using all of the oreos, some cookie butter, and a whole lot of ice, they finally were closer to what I preferred.  In the end, I determined I just plain prefer ice cream in my shakes.  

3. Community and vulnerability are good for my heart.  I went to a workshop/conference for a few days and even got to get creative and use some markers to share bits of my story (hence the color covered hand).  Life is messy and beautiful.  A few weeks after going, I found myself embracing the little phrase “be delicate.”  My head is still rolling this around and my heart is tugging at the seams when thinking about it. So often, I don’t show my delicate, tender, and soft side.  I don’t know where it will lead, but all that to say, that March has thrown that phrase into my vocabulary (and I rediscovered my love for picmonkey for editing and adding words to pictures).

4. This verse. Such goodness.  This month has exposed some of my “scorched places” and I am so thankful for a God who brings the rain and is with me in the fire.  Isaiah 58:11. 

5. I could put sprinkles on just about everything and be a happy girl.

6. This bump has gotten out of control and we still have 14 weeks to go!  March became the month of the baby bump popping out and me finally gaining some weight.  And let’s just say.  Baby still loves to move a ton.  🙂

6 weeks above and almost 26 weeks below.7. Lastly, I finally  figured out a way to organize and clean up my camera roll!  I deleted all of the photos off my camera roll this morning…first time, I have had an empty camera roll probably since I got this phone!  For some reason, my syncing hasn’t been quite great at deleting them after I imported them to iPhoto.  So, I didn’t know what I had on iPhoto and what I didn’t.  Either way, I made sure I had backed them up and had everything in order before deleting.  But let me tell you.  That thing was full!  I may or may not be a photo hoarder (2000ish photos later).

There you have it.  My random bits from March.  I’m hoping these next few days fly by and then April brings sunshine, showers, and pretty flowers.

What did you learn in March?

 

 

 

 

What’s Up Wednesday

hearing Boaz crunch on an apple that I deemed too old for me to eat

seeing the book of Luke and my DSM book

thinking that I’m ready for spring and to be able to go outside!

doing bible reading, breaking free, and a final exam

looking forward to seeing sigur ros, going to virginia, and planning another vacay

feeling content and happy to have Boaz home

touching the wooden chairs my grandmother made

missing africa and friends

thankful for being able to sleep in, cereal, pretty wedding pictures, marriage, friends, sunlight, mountains

excited about going to the mountains again

coming up easter, spring, and ally & levi coming home!

something old the shorts i’m wearing that i love

something new a super soft liberty sweatshirt that i got for free

something blue Boaz’s chew toy

day 43

Can you believe it!? We’ve been reading the Bible in chronological order for 43 days!  I know I’ve said this to multiple people over and over but…I am loving it and I am LOVING my Leadership Bible. So good. So full of richness.  If you are looking for a new bible and like learning about leadership then I would highly suggest it!  Beyond that, I’ve been mulling over a few big themes.  Here’s my mini recap in bullets of the areas where God hit me over the head as I looked back (especially the very last bullet point…that’s my big takeaway so far):

• Listen to God’s instructions and store them in your heart
• God put man where He wanted him.
• God pours out blessings right from the start. God loves to bless us.
• Maintain big picture perspective and eternal perspective
• Women seem to be always suggesting and planning and meddling and taking things into their own hands and not waiting…
• God sees ME
• Protect your people
• God is better at providing for me than I am
• God says no to our foolish talk.
• Lots of grumbling, complaining and demanding keeps you in the desert and not in the Promised Land
• God provides more than enough.
• Gifts…with wisdom!
• God guided them directly and clearly.  He wants to instruct us.
• God did all this for your good…to do you good in the end.
• God is so so so giving.
• Remember what God has done.
• Obey. Heed His voice. Follow Fully. Do exactly what God says.Walk in the ways God has commanded. Walk in His ways and fear Him.  Believe and obey. Hold fast to Him. Do what is right in the sight of the Lord. Walk always in His ways. Diligently obey. The Word is near that you may do it. Walk it out despite adversity. Integrity. Character. Obedience is key.

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What has God been hitting you over the head with in your reading?

 

Bible. 6 months. Chronologically.

Hello January 15th 2011!! Today’s the first day of reading through the Bible chronologically in 6 months! I’m just a *bit* excited.  I hope your first day of reading (Genesis 1-7) went/is/will go exceptionally well!

As I read about Eden this morning, I couldn’t help but come back to these words that sparked the image above.  Going deeper.  Embarking on this journey and even while preparing for it, I found myself drawn to this idea of wanting to be like a tree in the garden so firmly planted in God.  Trusting fully. I want Him to turn my brokenness, my desert places into blossoming flowers.  To let the bright Son shine through the darkness.  Even to let the painful pruning process produce more fruit in my life (and no I did not try to add as many alliterations as possible there…but it’s kind of fun 😉 ).

And so, since I tend to complicate things, I’m going with the simple.  Soaking up God-truths so that I can grow deeper.

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Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. ~Ephesians 3:17

The godly have deep roots. ~Proverbs 12:3

They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit. ~Jeremiah 17:18

It was strong and beautiful, with wide-spreading branches, for its roots went deep into abundant water. ~Ezekiel 31:7

The LORD will comfort Israel again and have pity on her ruins. Her desert will blossom like Eden, her barren wilderness like the garden of the LORD. Joy and gladness will be found there. Songs of thanksgiving will fill the air. ~Isaiah 51:3

I will be to Israel like a refreshing dew from heaven. Israel will blossom like the lily; it will send roots deep into the soil like the cedars in Lebanon. ~Hosea 14:5

They are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season. Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do. ~Psalm 1:3

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Here is the lovely code for the button above if you would like to use it.  Otherwise, feel free to copy/save the picture or make one of your own!

<p style=”text-align: center;”><a href=”https://bahava.wordpress.com/chronological/”><img title=”bible” src=”https://bahava.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/bible.jpg?w=300&#8243; alt=”” width=”211″ height=”164″ /></a></p>

Happy Reading!!

p.s. I’d love to hear what you thought about the first day of reading…leave me some comment love 🙂

miscellany monday

1.To a dark room

Two hours after walking through and listening to all sorts of scholars’ opinions, I finally entered a dark room to see some tiny writing. The Dead Sea Scrolls.  The whole exhibit transported me to a time where wine jugs were huge compared to our bottles, oral storytelling a lively norm, and the temple still stood. It was all oh so lovely, but oh, how I can’t wait to go see Israel someday!

2. 3 months

I started a reading plan that will take me through the Bible in three months. Intense? Yes! Already awesome? Yes! God is showing me new things every day and I’m learning to carve out more time in my day for Him. Because, it’s not about reading or making it through the plan…it’s about being intentional about loving and spending time with Him.

3. tried and true

I realized that when given a chance to eat delicious food at places I can’t go to often…I want a “tried and true” place. I really do like trying new places, but not at the expense of missing out on something that I already know I love!

4. i wanna dance with somebody

Speaking of liking what I know…I keep trying to like Pandora because then I can find some new music and expand my musical horizons within bounds–I’m ridiculously picky now about what I listen to and my iTunes is down to 1,983 songs from like oh I don’t know 5,000 probably at one point.  Anyway, I also LOVE the repeat button. So, I’m mostly a youtube girl. 🙂

5. wordpress girl

I also tried out blogger/blogspot this weekend since they had a bloggy name I liked, but alas, I went back to my tried and true wordpress because I do love it.  Though, during my little foray into the unknown, I did get a little creative and start making some fun updates on my sidebar.  I love creating and sooooooo wish I could take time to learn all things web creative related.

6. secret petition

One of the desires and secret petitions of my heart (Psalm 37:4) is that my man will have sweet skills like being able to make my blog pretty, having sweet editing software, be able to build me a deck, and oh so much more! I’d also be more than happy if he happened to have sweet toys…like a Nikon camera, an iPhone for me, and a trained horse (btw, I started laughing out loud AT MYSELF after I wrote down that last one…no idea where it came from, but seriously I would love to have a horse to ride). But really, those are just bonuses to his amazing personality and handsomeness. 🙂

7. beyond excited

Speaking of men and marriage, well, I am so beyond excited that two of my lovely interns just got engaged!! Not to mention that two others are getting married to each other this weekend (wish I could be there)!  Woot! Kind of crazy that out of a group of 8, 4 will be married soon and to people within the group!

8. birthdays

I realized the other day (aka yesterday) that I SO want an African birthday some day.  My birthday is December 18th so I missed it last year and will miss it this year as well.  Oh, and I think the month of December is absolutely fabulous.

9. creating experiences

Last week, I got to create a new experience for a little girly that I met at kids camp–love her so much.  After a lovely picnic where I found out she was allergic to bananas (uhhh–fail on the strawberry banana juicy juice), we went to get a floatie to head down a “river” (aka channel between two lakes).  She was SO cute and excited yet was totally not a fan of weeds or fish–a girl after my own heart!  I loved seeing her experience something new and step out of her comfort zone!

10. safe

My heart can get messy. My heart can feel and think all sorts of things that are put in that throw up your hands and go “I don’t know!” category.  Especially because there are parts of my story that can’t be told yet…that aren’t mine fully to share…that are still brewing for the day that God has prepared for them to be shared.  But, in the meantime, there are a few select people that hold my heart safely and let me share all of the messy.

oh, please do share a random musing or two of your own.

fierce

i’m fighting. my heart is weary, but my Shield is here.

when i find my heart wanting to say i’m scared….i remember and say “for god has not given me a spirit of fear but of power and of love and of a sound mind”