grief

This video of Ian Cron. I get.

Puddles of grief.

For most of my life I’ve been running away from these triggers, stories, moments…from this pain.

Ascribing the tears and running straight into these issues.  That’s the hard work.

And things that matter to me are issues even if I don’t want them to be issues (more often than not I don’t want to have any “issues”)

Owning my story in its fullness requires that I spend time sitting in the pain.

I am by far a “doer.” I problem solve, analyze, figure things out.  Sitting, being, enjoying….so much harder.

Wholeness takes work.  The hard work of sitting in the pain rather than running.

But, it’s worth it.  I catch glimpses of integrity and wholeness and just being me….and oh how my heart sings.  I long for that more often.  So, I’m choosing to sit in some of my grief today.

Do you have a hard time sitting in your pain? 

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7 thoughts on “grief

  1. oh, friend. this is so, so, SO right on. so proud of you for sitting in it, for paying the price of being whole…

    for dancing in those puddles of grief…

    keep pressing in & pressing on. you’re doing great.

    xo

  2. I think I write so that I can have a moment simply to “be” rather than “do” (even if it involves doing something). It gives me a moment to myself to remember my pain, to reflect, to pray, and to work with God in resolving it, or at least coming to terms with the fact that it may always be present.

    • totally. i am with you on that. i write and i run. those are some of the ways that it is easier for me to just “be.” but i am learning to just sit and be still as well because there is such power in that. the listening aspect at least.

  3. Pingback: Safeguarding « B'ahava

  4. Pingback: this one’s for me. 2 years…i didn’t know. « B'ahava

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