pride and triathlons

in less than two days, i’ll be swimming, biking, and running.

in order. consecutively.  600 yards, 13 miles, 2.8 miles.

i’ll be honest. i added this in partly because i’ve never done an official triathlon and hey it was on my “before going back to africa” list (i did an unofficial one so i figure an official one should be extra brownie points) and well i just like running and biking and trying new things and training.  though, i also wanted to add it in for “fun.” lately, whenever people ask me, “are you ready?” or “how’s the training been?” i half laugh and remark about how well i just added it in for “fun” and my main focus is marathon training. i mean i ran 18 miles last saturday. i should be able to finish this. plus, i cross train and i have been training some too. cue hiding from potential disappointment, but yes….moving on…

today, i did my first “brick” workout by biking and then running. (insert: i know, i know….probably should have been doing a LOT more of these) i have done days where i do two a day workouts…just hadn’t done one back to back really since last summer.

as i jumped on my bike and now reflecting back, i started listing those “fears” that come up with a race.

  • what if my goggles break
  • what if i can’t get my bike shoes on
  • what if i get a flat tire
  • what if i forget how to run
  • what if i can’t find my bike
  • what if i get disqualified
  • what if i run into a rabid dog or rabbit (okay i just made that one up now…but it could happen)
  • what if i wear the wrong thing

and you know what i realized. for me. i saw pride rearing it’s ugly head.

Why am I afraid? I’m afraid that I’ll look “dumb” or that I won’t “fit in” or that my time won’t be “good enough” or that I will be slower than “so and so” or that I’ll have to face disappointment.

Not only that, but….I’ve made my God so small that I forgot about all the awesome lessons that I could learn through those trials.  I’ve made my God into a God who only wants to shower me with prosperity and spare me the fire that refines me into gold.  Instead, I want to remember that I could learn how to persevere in the midst of all these roadblocks and things that could take me out of the race. I don’t want to forget that God is in the details. He’s not just concerned about having me cross the finish line, but He’s concerned about what happens on the journey (oh and don’t forget to cue philippians 4).  I forget that sometimes just maybe He lets rain fall down to teach us how to keep running in the storm.

Besides….how can I ENJOY God and ENJOY this race if I’m too busy focused on MYSELF and making me look good or perform well…and how can I love God and love others when I’m so busy puffing myself up and loving me according to the world’s standards…

just a few thoughts i’m pondering and mulling over. raw, unedited, not all that pretty and eloquent. just thoughts for now.

so…what about you…have you ever finished a race? how did it go? any tips!? what did you learn?

6 thoughts on “pride and triathlons

  1. In every blog post you write, there’s always one {or twenty :)} thing that sticks out to me. In this post, I loved what you said about how God cares about what happens on our journey, not how properous we are throughout.

    As for the whole race thing, the farthest I have ran without stopping is like half a mile (when I forced to in PE)! Riding bike, on the other hand, I’ve ridden an 100 mile bike ride before with my dad. It was so miserable but so wonderful at the same time! Kinda like the SATs! 🙂

    • yeah…that’s the part that i forgot often about god..that balance between remember His ways aren’t mine and what i think is prosperous and good may not really be good for me…kind of like that tasty doughnut whereas eating 20 wouldn’t be good!

      and WOW a 100 mile bike ride. that sounds intense but great! was it for a specific thing? i think my butt would need a long break after that….just sayin’

  2. seriously! I’m telling you, we are meant to be friends! I am training for a tri on June 26th!!! Gosh… our lives line up in such weird ways, I so wish I could meet you. 🙂 teehee!

    Don’t think I’m a creeper 😉

    • seriously!? that’s SO awesome! i’m excited for you!! how is training going?
      i agree. it’d be fun to meet!
      p.s. you’re not a creeper. 🙂

  3. Good luck! Sounds like you have put in the training and I am sure you will do fine. Try not to stress out to much over the race…it’s your first one, just enjoy it.

    I remember my first tri…I sprinted into the water and dove over a wave only to do a face plant in the sand and knock my goggles off!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s