grey

dear grey,

i’m learning to like you.  i’m learning to see the freedom you can bring.  you gently remind me that things don’t need to be “all or nothing.”  even trust has levels.  friendships are not either all or nothing.  i like clarity and you’re showing me that you can still mean that. i used to think that grey meant fuzzy, undefined, messy, in between.  i’m certainly glad that as i get to know you i’m realizing how that is so not like you.  you let the boundaries be healthy.  you’re teaching me the levels of transparency and guarding my heart.  you might even be teaching me to start to value me.  though, i must say, i am not used to all this “wait and see” business that often comes with you.  but i do believe. i do trust. that in the waiting and the seeing. god is faithful, walking with me, and sees me.  i don’t go unnoticed.  goodness, He’s even cheering me on and saying i’m proud you’re finally stepping out from those shadows into light.  and so i wait and see.  knowing that it’s in these moments that i can learn so much about myself and about my beloved as i simply trust.  and so with god’s gentle hand the grey is given a shape that lets me be me. so thank you, grey.

love,

katy