Wives Submit!

As a follow-up to Lauren Winner’s talk, I happened to go to a P31 talk at Northwestern the other night.  The Women’s Ministries’ Pastor at Bethlehem Baptist spoke on submission.  Since I’m still in a “list” mood I’ll do the same as I did with the Lauren Winner talk.  Here you go!

  • Submission: stand in awe
  • Reverence for God produces wisdom which produces virtue
  • Submission is NOT: being a doormat, being passive, sinning under the authority of a husband, indicative of inferior
  • Submission involves respect, joyfully placing under, trusting God
  • Before the fall there was “joint-rulership”
  • Women are not to submit to all men–the charge is about wives submitting to one husband
  • Genesis 4:6-7 talks about the curse and how “her desire is to rule over him”
  • 1 Cor. 11:3 makes a distinction of roles including that between God and Christ–there is role distinction, but in the same way one is not better than the other, they are equal.
  • Submission is not about putting the husband in the place of Christ
  • The Bible never tells *men* to make their wives submit–submission is the wife’s responsibility

Verses To Look Up/Mentioned: Proverbs 31, Psalm 110:1, Ephesians 5:22-24, Ephesians 5:33, Col. 3:18, Titus 2:3-5, 1 Cor. 7, 1 Peter 3:1-6, 1 Cor. 11, Genesis 4:6-7

Suggested Books: Intimate Issues by Linda Dillow, True Woman by Susan Hunt, Sex for Christians by Lewis Smedes (suggested by Lauren Winner)

Distortion and Deception

A few weeks ago I went to the Chapel where Lauren Winner spoke.  She has written Real Sex: The Naked Truth About Chastity and Girl Meets God.  I just noticed she had a book coming out today too! Mudhouse Sabbath: An Invitation to a Life of Spiritual Disciplines.  Now that I’ve fully publicized her books (which I haven’t read, but want to), we can move on to the actual talk.

Here are some of the key points/interesting quotes

  • “I’m a writer mostly because I don’t know what I think until I write about it”–I agree with this wholeheartedly!  I can see my opinions and ideas SO much more clearly after I’ve written about them.
  • The notion that if you have premarital sex or engage in sexual sin then you will wake up feeling awful is a LIE. This may be true for some, but not for everyone.
  •  Our feelings and epistemologies are DISTORTED
  • Feelings have to be refined and checked against scripture.
  • Lie # 2: If you’ve had premarital sex or other sexual sin you will be scarred for life, you’ve committed an unforgivable sin, it will haunt you, ect.  Though, the lessons of sexual sin are long lasting and many find it hard to unlearn behavior.
  • Jesus is the “master gardener”
  • Be careful not to idolize marriage
  • We can be quite prone to self-deception–especially in areas of sex, money and time.
  • Repentance is not about pretending the sin did not happen–rather it is about turning and living faithfully

For me, the biggest part that hit close to home was the reminder that my feelings are distorted and that I am really good at deceiving myself.  Eventually in the “Confessional” blogs I will probably expand on these thoughts.


I absolutely HATE being cold.  I’m cold often unfortunately.

10 Signs Your House is Cold/You’re too Poor to Afford Heat

1. You leave the house to go to a coffee shop because you’re too cold.

2. You take hot showers to get warm (i.e. after work 🙂 )

3. You wear two pairs of pants.

4. You sleep with two down comforters in addition to the other 3-4 blankets on your bed along with flannel sheets.

5. You leave your coat on when you get home

6. You hate getting out of the shower because you’re going to freeze.

7. You leave the oven open after you’ve baked something

8. You bake something just to make the house warmer!

9. You constantly drink hot things like hot chocolate or tea in attempt to warm up.

10. You hardly ever get to wear shorts and halter tops even though they’re you’re favorite thing to wear.

Messy Relationships

Ephesians 4:15

but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ,

The balance between truth and love in relationships makes a BIG difference.

Here are some thoughts from group discussion on the varying levels of truth and love:

All Truth

  • Cactus Christian–always poking and pointing out wrong things or “truth”
  • Chameleon

All Love

  • Minnesota Nice
  • Shallow
  • No Vulnerability
  • Passive Aggressive
  • Two-Faced (in instances where someone is nice to the person and then talks about them behind their back)
  • We shy away from conflict

Other thoughts

  • Anger doesn’t have a place at the table even if it’s just–“If I take anger to the table, I will sin”
  • Healthy balance
  • Getting so intensely angry that we shut down and refuse to let relationships and conversations happen
  • Mercy included
  • Making mentoring and relationships a priority–addressing conflict or issues
  • Matthew 7
  • Power of prayer!

Finally, we went through a sheet on confronting sin.  The examples happened to be 3 situations regarding sexual sin.  After the examples, I was thankful that one of the people in the class made a point to address the fact that the church so often obsesses and focuses so much on sexual sin without addressing other issues like pride or greed.

Also, something that I found interesting was how in classes like that we really DON’T know where a lot of the people are coming from and the experiences they have.  This is beneficial to the class because then we can learn so much more.  A couple people shared about their experiences dating non-believers and one even was currently dating someone.  Then there’s also the question of who in the room has dealt with sexual sin.  Plus, this isn’t even counting the day to day struggles each person deals with.

I’m staying…

Now that I am officially employed full-time…I guess I’m staying in the area for a while. Very weird to think about! Even though I kind of assumed/thought I would be…still. The realization that I have to find new doctors, dentists, places, ect makes me a bit sad. I like home even though I know I don’t want to be there now and that I’m not supposed to be there. Funny how I’m more homesick now than I’ve ever been–I don’t really get homesick…

But when I was driving the other day I just wanted to be able to drive to that place where I drive when I don’t know where else to go…the place you drive when you don’t want to go home quite yet, the place that gets you every time, that makes you smile even if you’re crying, yeah that place…

So, I’m staying…but looking for that place.



“Jesus was that guy people loved to hang out with” -Mark Driscoll  from his sermon “Humor”

–The sermon is super fun and funny so if you get a chance go listen to it 🙂 The other ones in the series are great too!


I hate being sick. I’m not a happy person. I am a wimp when it comes to being sick. When I’m sick, I just want to be at home with my dog (who unlike the dog here doesn’t bark and be annoying), my bed, and having *that* person holding me while I sleep and making it all better. Plus, I hate coughing because I have asthma so then it feels like I can’t breathe and am going to have an attack. I also hate runny noses because honestly haven’t I dealt with enough of that during allergy season (especially before I got allergy shots)!?

Okay, I’ll stop complaining and being a wimp and go back to sleep (so I can get better fast since I start my new job on Tuesday!!) in my ultra comfy bed with a pillow top and a feather bed and pretend my dog is here and forget about *that* person and be thankful that it’s the weekend, that I have a God who is more than enough, and I will get better eventually 🙂 Hope you’re all feeling better than I am!


Other Blogs :)

I love reading other blogs.

I love when I can see myself in their thoughts.

I love being challenged by their posts.

So, here are a few posts/blogs that have recently caught my eye:


Always Late 

Compassion –This is one of the bloggers who went to Africa with Compassion–you can look at the other blogs from her site 🙂

Dating and Getting Up Early

Spiritual Masturbation Series and if you go back a ways then there are the Christian Cliches 

Credit Card Therapy 

“Does Anybody Hear Her”-Casting Crowns

 She is running

A hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction

She is trying

But the canyon’s ever widening

She is searching

For a hero to ride in  and save the day

And in walks in her prince charming

And he knows just what to say

And she gives herself away

Does anybody hear her?  Does anybody see?

Does anybody even know she’s going down today?